So I am dating again…dating in this city sucks…its so fucking easy to meet people here, but its so fucking hard to find something real…I am fucking picky I admit that…I will see and talk to so many people in one night and maybe one night here and there I will make out with someone but I always feel like the girl at the end of the night… thinking to myself will this hottie call me back n the morning or was I just another notch in her bed post...there is a reason why this city has the highest percentage of single women in the country...the girls here are what they are, I don’t know why, too many hot gay guys or too many unattached people lost from home, whatever…I am not about it…and I just like to say I hate how I lost control of my body last night…I bet lots of people did things they didn’t expect they would do last night...and today as I walked through the kitchen at work thinking about how extreme the emotions I felt when I saw my ex walk in last night...just in time to see a cell phone being passed around the kitchen with a picture of a half naked girl on it...i know i am better then that...I felt like the lives of so many people could have changed last night by one thing just being different…I don’t know where I belong…I feel like a salmon going down stream when the rest are going up…I am a nice guy…I am an asshole too…I am boring…I am fun…I am skinny…I am fucking strong…I am who I am….i am wandering around this town like a blind slug searching for a shell to call home…I am clutching my phone wondering where I went wrong, when does it all feel right…I had it in my hand last night…it felt good at the time…now it feels like heartless lovesucking vampires eating my life away…
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